


In Vino Veritas, They Say

by abrosuna



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: 1977 circa, Fluff, Kaz is adorable and Ocelot dies every time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-31
Updated: 2016-07-31
Packaged: 2018-07-28 12:21:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7639957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abrosuna/pseuds/abrosuna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in 1977 circa.</p>
<p>Ocelot thought it would've been fun to deal with a drunk Kaz, but he didn't know a few surprises awaited him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Vino Veritas, They Say

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank aliceaka (tumblr) for giving me the idea for this and for all the support she gave me! Here's the disgusting fluff I promised, haha ~

Drinking wasn’t even the point of that evening, therefore getting drunk wasn’t exactly included in the plans the group had in mind – but Miller had definitely had too much wine. One could tell by the bright red which gave colour to his cheeks and nose, by his unsteady movements, or, simply put, by the fact that the two bottles at their table were both empty even though three of the crew had exclusively gone for water.

That morning, while having a small chat with a few other soldiers, Ocelot suggested that they should sit at the same table and have dinner together, for once, and since the commander happened to pass by in that moment the invitation was extended to him too.

«Just because the boys asked before you did,» he replied, sneering at the Instructor. «Even though I’ll probably end up choking you anyway.»

Contrarily to Miller’s expectations, though, it ended up being a nice evening: Kaz and Ocelot’s usual bickering was unavoidable, but it happened to be more playful and less aggressive than usual, thus it wasn’t so bad. For the other men’s part it was fun to watch, actually. Moreover it needs to be said that Kaz swallowed a generous glass of wine quite early, so he seemed more cheerful than his usual self.

But between being a little cheerful and getting drunk there were several other glasses of wine, and apparently he had refused none of them.

«No way that’s true! I don’t _always_ argue with you.»

The commander looked dead serious, while he found it hard to properly place his elbow on the table in an attempt to make a gesture with his hand that should have obtained Ocelot’s complete attention, which resulted to be hilarious.

«We built this shit together. See? It’s beautiful. _They_ are beautiful.» He waved his hand to point at the soldiers that were sitting together with them. That same hand then moved towards Ocelot’s shoulder, and there it remained with a strong grip. «You and I, my friend – yes, you are my friend! Buddy. Not my best buddy, though, ‘cause you’re kinda annoying, but a good fellow – yes.»

The other guys were hardly refraining from giggling only because they wanted to respect their commander. Ocelot, on the other hand, was on the verge of bursting out laughing, and he wouldn’t have minded doing it in Miller’s face. The confidence in the blond’s eyes, which was of course due to his being drunk, was even more clear now that he had taken his sunglasses off, placing them above his forehead, and it clashed exquisitely with the utter nonsense he kept speaking.

«So you don’t hate me?» Ocelot teased him.

«I never said I hate you!»

«You do all the time.»

«No, no no no no no.» Kaz put his arm around Ocelot’s shoulders, pulling him closer. «I like you, man. Com’ere, gimmie a kiss.» And he grabbed the older man’s cheeks with his other hand.

Ocelot was quick to react, and pushed him away with a gentle but firm shove.

«You’re embarrassing yourself in front of your men, commander,» he said with a grin. «You’re going to regret this tomorrow. Unless someone here is good at keeping secrets…» He glanced at the soldier sitting in front of him, faking a serious expression for a second, but he immediately dropped the act and winked. «Although I wouldn’t be so sure about that.»

The man covered his mouth with his fingers, pressing them on his lips in order to suppress any sound that was about to come out. The commander, however, didn’t seem to mind.

«Don’t be silly,» he said, emphasising each word for no reason. Who was being silly again? «I’m just being nice, that’s all.»

«That’s the odd part,» Ocelot whispered. This time the other guys couldn’t keep from laughing out loud.

But Miller continued, without paying attention to them. «No need to be embarrassed. Who’s embarrassed, anyway? Why? It’s ok, buddy, you can talk to me. Don’t be shy.»

It was almost as if he were talking to himself, at this point, because he wasn’t referring to anyone in particular, and his stare kept travelling from face to face, sometimes falling to the surface of the table and zoning out.

Soon enough Ocelot decided to interrupt him by gently touching his shoulder before standing up.

«All right, Miller, your time’s up. I’d better take you to your room before you start singing – no-one wants to hear that. I’m sorry, guys,» he then added after a chuckle, apologising both with his words and his eyes.

Each of the others hurried to reassure him that there was no problem, shaking their heads or smiling or waving their hands, saying that it had been a fun night and whishing that it could be repeated some other time.

The Instructor helped Kaz to stand to up in order not to let him trip on the bench, which, judging by his current instability, would have happened for sure if he had been alone. The older man then grabbed him by his waist to support him, greeting their friends one last time before leaving.

He had to walk slowly and pay attention to each step, but at least Miller had spontaneously and in some way meekly put his own arm around his neck, which made things a bit easier despite the blond’s clumsiness.

«You really had to drink that much, didn’t you?» Ocelot sighed, although not expecting an actual reply.

«Hey, don’t be so harsh,» Kaz complained, «I’m perfectly fine. Besides, you still owe me a kiss.»

«How does that even— I owe you nothing. _You_ should be grateful that I’m troubling myself as far as accompanying you when I could’ve simply watched you fall asleep on the table and left you there.»

Kaz weakly shook his head. «No no no, you do owe me a kiss, don’t you even try to pretend you don’t.»

Ocelot decided to ignore him, since Miller was definitely too wasted to have a decent conversation with him. To be fairly honest, he didn’t feel like talking about kisses, not with him. He was already feeling uncomfortable enough without having to picture that the two of them could have exchanged a kiss in front of everyone, although just a quick peck on the lips – or was it his cheek that Miller was going for? It didn’t seem so... Really, a peck on the lips in front of everyone, if only he hadn’t stopped him, if only – oh, great, he had ended up thinking about it.

The Tactical Instructor shut his eyes for a second to stop the flow his thoughts were following and direct it somewhere else. In the meantime Miller had kept blabbering, apparently, because he was still talking.

«And you’re not even listening!» he cried, after noticing that Ocelot wasn’t paying attention. «I’m telling you all this, and you’re not listening! I’m offended!»

«Telling what?» the other man asked, resigned. Maybe letting Miller speak as much as he pleased, pretending to be interested in order to make him go on, would have made the way to his room seem shorter. Or at least Ocelot could’ve kept his mind distracted.

«I said that I like you, Adam.»

Ocelot’s silence made those words sound even more striking than they were intended to be.

«Please, don’t call me that,» he simply said then, his eyes fixed on the ground.

Kaz halted all of a sudden, forcing the other to stop too, and raised his glance on him even though unable to make eye contact.

«Is this everything you’re going to say?» He was too worn out to be actually mad, but he sounded somewhat shaken.

«You’re drunk, Miller, you have no idea what you’re saying. Let’s just get to your room, all right?»

«No way!» Kaz broke free from Ocelot’s grip and placed himself in front of the other, facing him. «You don’t like me, is that it? It must be it. You don’t like me, all right. It’s ok. But fucking say so, damn it!»

Now that Ocelot was looking at him, he could say that the blond wasn’t mad at all: in fact, he was disappointed, and maybe a little upset. It had to be the effects of alcohol, Ocelot thought. He couldn’t be serious, could he?

«You don’t like me, right? To you I’m just that one pain in the ass of a colleague. Right.»

«That’s not it...»

«Damn right if it is.»

He looked so sincere, though, as he insisted like that, almost pouting like a child. He also looked kind of cute – but that was definitely not the time to linger on that sort of considerations. Could it be that, instead of random silliness, that was how he truly felt deep inside of his heart, below layers of dislike and hostility?

Ocelot took a moment to choose his words, while Kaz was still staring at him. Those blue eyes sure could be distracting; even if his gaze managed to avoid them and not to get lost in them, the man could still feel them scanning his expression. It wasn’t easy to concentrate.

«It’s not true that I don’t like you. You said that yourself before, remember? We’re good buddies, after all. We annoy the hell out of each other, but we can also enjoy each other’s company. You said you like me, and I like you too. Does this sound good to you?»

He spoke in a soft and reassuring voice, his stance relaxed and his lips nearly curved into a smile. He really did know how to sway people, soothing them to the point where he could make them agree to anything. But Kaz was too focused on something important he had on his mind to fall for that.

He approached Ocelot, closing the distance between them with one wobbly step, slid his arms around the older man’s neck and whispered: «That’s not what I meant. You really weren’t listening, huh? I like you, Adam.»

What happened next, Ocelot couldn’t tell with precision; he simply felt his whole body give in as Kaz leaned forward and kissed him. Then, Kaz’s warm lips softly pressing against his own. Hot quivers running down his spine and below his skin, like flames that didn’t hurt but compelled him to move and to do something: his hands felt as if they were electrified, they itched to reach for Kaz’s face and touch his skin – and they did, they hungrily stroked his cheekbones and jaw line and went down his neck in search for his shoulders, as the two men slowly deepened the kiss.

Being a spy, of course Ocelot was a good actor. When Miller had tried to drag him closer, earlier at the table, his heart flipped. He panicked for a second, because he was not expecting something like that, but luckily he managed to stay cool and to avoid what would have been a major catastrophe: if their lips had actually touched, he would’ve never gathered the will to pull away, and he wouldn’t have given a damn about making out in front of everyone. He pretended to be calm and collected, made a few jokes with ease, but deep inside he was struggling not to let his weakness take control of his body. Heaven knows how he kept from blushing.

He did wish to be closer to Kaz. It took him a month or two to realise what he felt towards the commander of the new Mother Base they were building together, but he came to terms with it pretty quickly and it didn’t bother him much.  Falling in love wasn’t a problem for him, he knew how to put his personal feelings aside when they could be in the way; besides, from what he had been told about how things worked on Mother Base back in the days of MSF, romantic relationships in that kind of environment weren’t seen as something that needed to be avoided for the sake of professionalism – everyone was free to do as they pleased, as long as they didn’t neglect their jobs or cause a ruckus.

What he was unsure about, though, were the commander’s feelings towards him. Not because of their troubled relationship, with their different opinions about almost anything and frequent arguments: had it been only that, it would’ve been easy to conclude that Miller genuinely hated him, and that would’ve ended it. In fact, Kaz’s behaviour was often contradictory. Every so often it occurred that the two of them could actually spend some time together like two friends would, just chilling and joking or working together but without quarrelling, and it wasn’t so rare as to think it was some kind of miracle. Then, when it was one of these days and they also happened to be alone, Kaz could even be sweet from time to time, although he was always quick to hide a smile or to add an insult after having said something nice. The Russian spy could have sworn to have seen him blush, even, despite his aviators covering part of his cheeks.

That was why Ocelot was confused and didn’t know how to proceed. What did all those kind words and laughs mean to Miller? Was there really something more or was it just Ocelot imagining it because he wished for it? The Instructor was planning on trying to find out with due caution and without hurrying things, at the same time doing his best to strengthen their bond.

Except a certain someone had decided to get drunk and, well, hurry things.

Without letting their lips part, Ocelot dragged Kaz towards a wall of the nearest building, just in case someone happened to pass by. The blond’s expression was so relaxed that it made him look younger, and thus even more attractive. As if he could get any more handsome than he already was, Ocelot remarked somewhere in his mind. Not only that – after having made the first move, he was completely abandoning himself in the older man’s arms, which were now wrapped around his waist, and his kisses had become slower and sloppy; he was being almost submissive, probably because alcohol was making him feel tired, and Ocelot found it engaging in some way. Maybe a bit too much.

«Kaz...» He pressed a kiss on the corner of the blond’s lips. «You have to rest, or else you’ll wake up with a terrible headache tomorrow. Let’s go to your room.»

He himself had no idea what he meant with that last sentence, because he had no idea what he wanted to do. Well, actually, he had – but he also had a weird feeling of uneasiness about it, thus he didn’t have a clue about how he would have acted once they had reached the door to the commander’s bedroom.

Not that he had the time to think about it and come to a decision anyway, since Kaz immediately grabbed his wrist and headed towards his room, his wavering steps filled with determination, which resulted rather amusing.

The door opened, but there were no greetings, because the both of them went inside. The door closed, and once again not a word was uttered, because their lips joined right away. It was only a matter of seconds before they fell onto the bed, and they found themselves embraced tightly, wrinkling the sheets with their movements and their kisses leaving each other’s lips wet and swollen.

Ocelot dared to break the kiss to move towards Kaz’s neck, and the younger man seemed to appreciate that enormously, as he threw his head back and closed his eyes.

«Adam...» he let out in a whisper.

Ocelot didn’t stop, but he felt his heart skip a beat. That was already the second time in less than an hour, but Miller had never called him by his real name before, and him doing it all of a sudden sounded thoroughly intimate. Not that “Adam” in itself held something special: Eva called him that, for example, sometimes John too, and it had even been used as his codename during some operations, to speak the truth. But hearing it from Kaz’s lips... It was something completely different. Probably both because it had never happened and because he had been _wanting_ for it to happen – in any case, it stroke an arrow straight to his heart. That was also why he had asked the other man to refrain from doing it, the first time: he didn’t want to feel his chest warmed with hope because of something as ridiculous as that.

«I like you so much, Adam... So, so much...»

_But is it you speaking, Miller? Or is it the wine you drank earlier?_ Ocelot was trying not to think about it, but, as much as being that close to Kaz made all his will to resist vanish, he couldn’t avoid taking into account that Kaz was, all things considered, drunk. Didn’t that mean he was taking advantage of him as he wasn’t fully conscious of his actions? Miller was the one to insist so much, though... But then the same doubt came up again: was he being sincere or was he just fooling around?

Ocelot moved his head away for a moment to look at Kaz’s face. He would’ve never had another occasion to see him like that, his hair all messed up because of the work of his fingers, his aviators about to fall from his head, his eyelids lowered so that his eyelashes dimmed his bright blue eyes. Sure as hell the next day he would’ve gone back to being the same grumpy commander as ever, and either he would’ve forgotten everything or he would’ve denied it, pretending not to remember. It didn’t matter what was motivating him, therefore: the consequences would’ve been the same in any case.

Besides, Kaz’s little moans when Ocelot kissed his neck were terribly arousing, and the older man was way too weak to resist. After all, he was conscious since the beginning that he had no intention on fighting back _anything_ that would’ve surfaced if Kaz got too close to him, whatever the situation.

He made Miller roll on his back and climbed on top of him in order to reach more of his neck, but he barely managed to place a few kisses on his throat before the other man grabbed him by his collar and dragged him upwards, demanding a proper kiss on the lips. Ocelot closed his eyes and savoured it, drowning in a sensation of bliss so intense that it sent his mind into a sweet state of confusion. How could have he controlled himself and refused all this in the first place? It felt so nice it was impossible to say no, he thought.

«Say, Kaz, what do you want now?» he said in a mellow voice, gently stroking the blond’s jaw right below his ear.

«You.»

The reply was so immediate that Ocelot had to pause a second to take it in. There hadn’t been the slightest hesitation, as if that were the most natural answer that was to be expected from that kind of question. It was incredibly sweet. And the Instructor wasn’t prepared at all.

He tried to rapidly pull himself together, discarding the thought. He fixed his stare on Kaz’s eyes, searching for a glimpse of desire in them, as he trailed his thumb over his lower lip.

«All right... What do you want me to do, then?»

This time the answer was more fitting to what he had in mind. «Make... Make me yours.»

With a corner of his mouth raised in a smirk, he was about to assault Kaz’s neck with more enthusiasm, but in that moment the blond lifted one hand and clumsily cupped one side of Ocelot’s face, brushing it lightly. The older man had never seen that expression on him: so earnest, free from the worry to maintain a certain composure – tender, almost.

«And... be mine. Please.»

It was only a soft whisper, but it was more than enough to make Ocelot’s heart stop for a second, then start pounding louder and faster.

«Sure,» he said, placing a gentle kiss on Kaz’s eyelid and rolling back on his side, next to the other man.

That was his answer: yes, it meant to take advantage of Miller. No matter how badly he wanted it, it felt like a trickery, like some kind of dishonest shortcut, and he respected the man he loved too much to do something like that to him. He was well aware that, given Miller’s personality, he would’ve had to wait ages before tasting his lips and relishing the sensation of holding him between his arms again, but he was ok with it. He chose to wait because now he had something else too, the answer to another question he had been torturing himself with: yes, those were Kaz’s true feelings towards him.

«Damn, Miller... Next time I want to see you blushing because of me, not because of alcohol,» he said in a low and soft tone, placing his hand on Kaz’s cheek and giving him a warm smile.

Kaz looked confused, and Ocelot let out a chuckle under his breath.

The Instructor’s hand moved to the young man’s blond hair, petting it with rhythmic and regular strokes. This was so different from the usual Kazuhira Miller he knew that for a second he felt his chest hurt at the thought of waking up the next day and going back to normality. Not that he didn’t like it – after all, he had fallen in love with the grouchy commander of the Diamond Dogs, and for better or for worse he was fond of the relationship they had – only he longed for something more, something like what they were having now. Something like what they all but had that night.

Miller muttered something indistinguishable as his eyelids became heavier and his eyes slowly closed. Not even a whole minute had passed, and he had fallen asleep, his lips parted and his breath steady. He looked like a baby.

Once more Ocelot smiled, his heart filled with affection. He got up and slid off the bed, paying attention not to wake the other man up, even though he was sleeping so soundly he probably wouldn’t have heard a thing even if  someone had barged in slamming the door. As soon as he stood up, Ocelot stretched his back, letting out a silent sigh. He gazed at Kaz, retrieved the blanket that was hanging off the edge of the bed and covered him with it, then he left a last caress on his forehead with the back of his fingers before picking up his sunglasses, which had fallen on the sheets, and placing them on the nightstand. Finally he left the room, closing the door behind his back, leaning against it for a few seconds.

The air outside was chilly, especially in contrast to that warm and cosy of the commander’s bedroom.

On the way to his own room, Ocelot found himself thinking about how Kaz had uttered that “be mine”. It was so pure, so terribly sweet – so sincere. It was only in that moment that he fully realised that was how Miller felt towards _him;_ now he knew that when they were alone he wasn’t the only one to feel that there was something which tied them together, even though at the moment just loosely.

No matter how long he would’ve had to wait, no matter how many quarrels he would’ve had to go through before being able to grab that idiot’s face and kiss him again: he would’ve gotten to him one day, and he would’ve held him between his arms, conscious and willing to be there.

Conscious and willing... Ocelot wondered what kind of face Kaz would’ve made.

He grinned to himself, slightly hastening his pace.

Waiting to see something like that was absolutely worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks a lot for reading!  
> This is the first time I've completed something written in English, which is not my first language, so please feel free to let me know if there are any mistakes.  
> I hope you enjoyed it even just a little!


End file.
